As I was spiraling through my patterning, I had the opportunity to get a good look at a wonderful pattern. The pattern that keeps me in the “right” to complain, blame others for my experience, and feel victimized by circumstances and people. There I thought I had worked through that, but it appeared that there was another level of intensity that I could become clear about. Sure, I know I’m the creator of my own reality – I take full responsibility, except when I complain, or judge, or fall into these states where I feel sorry for my (perceived) bad luck and so on. Only then, I’m rather not the creator of my own reality… In those moments, I disavow my creator status. By doing that, I basically am very mean to myself. With my resistance to accepting that it is my creation, I say in energetic “words” – “I did not do that – therefore, I’m not a creator”. Strangely enough, when I last revisited this subject, it felt like I was facing a really tough decision – one that asks me to give up complaining and blaming others (more and more) and one that asks me to step into the identity as being a responsible creator. It was the moment in which I realized, that once I fully embrace this, I will no longer pretend I am something that I am not. Authenticity had just gotten more real than ever before. My perception has since shifted from seeing my experience as something I am looking at, to something I actually caused to appear. The impact of taking full responsibility for this is sobering to say the least. I am happy to be in this place, for the path that lead me here was my unique creation as well, and I am fully responsible for every bit in my reality.
Imagine life as one immensely large image made of countless puzzle pieces. Imagine further, that this image is forever changing and is in a state of perpetual motion. The puzzle pieces keep morphing, moving, adjusting in rhythm with this image. Life – the image/experience would not be complete(able) without all the puzzle pieces.
Have you ever worked on a 2D jigsaw puzzle and found that after all the pieces had been joined into the image, there was one or a few missing? That never feels good. Have you ever tried to put a piece into a place where it looked like it ought to fit, but then it just would not? Have you ever paused to appreciate that we humans in this life are part of a much larger puzzle and each piece is uniquely suited to fit into the bigger picture? That is how I view life. Each piece of the puzzle is unique, individual and essential. Yes, some look like they are the same, but in essence they won’t fit into the spot you thought they should. Some others look like they should just not be there, they look ugly or unsuited perhaps. However, each one is immensely important to the whole, for without it, the image would have gaps. No two pieces are exactly the same. No two pieces are meant to be the same. That is the state of diversity and at the same time oneness – and yes, it does look chaotic at times (or most of the time).
Each piece can be appreciated for what it is and at least conceptually be accepted as fitting into the bigger picture in a most unique and beautiful way. I find that it is time to let go of the idea that we must be like everyone else – when in reality, no two puzzle pieces are exactly the same. It’s just not how puzzles work.
This journey through life is truly a one-way trip. You can never go back to where you were just a moment before, even if you wish it. Such a wish is always met with an emotion that is less than pleasant – most times, that emotion is called regret. We interpret regret to mean that we are needed back where we were to “make things right”. The more we wish for that, the louder the emotional feedback becomes, the more we misinterpret it to mean that we’ve done wrong and that it is necessary to go back. Eventually, we just manage to feel even more sad than we felt before. This cycles if we don’t apply the universal truth that says: “You can only evolve to go beyond that which you once were.” Going back to relive, re-do, or re-create something is simply not possible. We cannot become less than what we have become.
We can however evolve and expand to grow beyond that which we are. That is a given. That is the gift of life itself!
The moment you look forward to what you newly wish to become, you will feel the emotional response of relief. Relief is the indicator that you are letting go of what you have tried to hold onto or go back to. Say, this past event which you regrettably cannot go back to and improve, has given rise to a desire for an improved version of a similar situation. Then it is preferable to allow the old situation to be what it was, and eagerly place your attention to the new and improved version that has emerged into your consciousnes exactly because of having experienced the old situation. When you decide to turn your attention to the new and gently allow the old to be what it was, you will summon the necessary life force that will bring the new and improved version into your experience. If you however wallow in regrets, you will experience a sense of stagnation that pools around you and only brings more emotional feedback signals ranging from sadness to deep depression. Moving on is necessary to keep the life force flowing. Doing so will be rewarded with positive emotional feedback accompanied by a boost of energy every single time.
In order to experience the life you always wanted, the one you decided you could love, you must first love life itself.
Our fantastic human brains respond very easily to the mass consciousness belief of “fighting against that which is bad”. Humanity has with loads of practice reached a place long ago, where that fighter spirit is the default and it responds to everything from the most insignificant subject to those subjects that impact nations and the earth itself. On my journey, I’ve spiraled into the experiential understanding that resistance is equal to focus (in intensity and duration). It is not only futile to resist, it’s actually counterproductive. While in the resistant state, we will never experience that which we want to experience in the amazing details we have conjured up due to the contrast we have experienced. In a state of resistance, that which has given rise to identify the preference is still being focused upon and the new cannot be experienced, as we are no vibrational match to it yet. Every process, every work plan we may have to edge away from resisting, for who wants to focus on the unwanted voluntarily, means only one thing – we have declared resistance to be the unwanted thing and are resisting it with that same fighter spirit that is humanity’s default still. It’s a double whammy at that point and it will always feel bad to be in such a state of double resistance.
Allowing resistance to be a part of our lives’ experiences takes practice. It takes letting go. It takes allowing the “negative” emotions to be there, it takes releasing any and all pushing against feeling bad. It takes embracing the emotion as a natural reminder that there is greater well being in store and more ease still to be had. The reminder, that for now, in that negative emotion, you’re just as healthy as you are in full bliss and vibrational alignment with your source point. It is natural to resist while physically focused. It is normal to feel bad because of the resistance and it is ultimately easy to allow the natural unfolding of that process without resisting resistance so much. The following words have helped me reach levels of allowing that are greater than those I allowed before:
“There is no place to get to, there is nothing to do. I am here, now, in the state I am in anyway and since that is where I am at, I trust it to be perfect for me. I allow it to be just as it is. I pay attention to the experience and deem it right and good. I put my boat into the stream of my own creation and float towards that which source has in store for me with ease and quiet curiosity.”
It is a calm state this state of allowing resistance to be what it is. In this calm, resistance dissolves all on its own. As my focus on it lessens, I experience more of my natural state of being, since source always allows everything unconditionally. Alignment is the inevitable consequence.
All things, every little detail here on Earth, are a reflection of well being, for even in the contrast of seeming absence of well being resides the promise of well being, and the expansion into even greater well being.
What followed from this reminder was an intense desire to practice. Put the mental knowledge into a tangible experience. That desire felt so good, it must have been well aligned with my source point’s desire. To feel that good is to align with source. To align with source is to leave behind the dichotomies of polarity; or better said, put the notion of division a bit out of focus. The new focus is on well being. Well being is the order of the universe. Well being prevails. Consensus reality says differently. Mass consciousness is hooked on the bad news and the gory horrors of “negative” earthly experiences. That current prevails and is palpable to me, as I focus on well being. It offers itself at the core of my intentions as the one thing to practice with and so I do. Even the seemingly negative currents of mass consciousness are well being, the promise of greater well being anyway. The noticing of well being all around is becoming a fun training of the mind and it gets more playful the longer I keep at it. The physical experience and the knowledge of the non-physical well being that never wavers are beginning to get fuzzy around the edges and merge together into one big pool of wellness. All is well, this pool shouts at me whenever I steer my focus there. All is well eternally.
Even if you find yourself in an experience that pushes against everything that you previously believed to be true for you, know at all times, that source has your back and everything is the perfect unfolding of your very own path.
(Courtesy of: http://www.facebook.com/mindfulwishes)
A human’s stubborn refusal to see beyond the physical is often an expression of his or her greatest ability to focus. In the spirit of allowing all that can come forth to be as it is; to observe everything unfolding with the precision of the universal forces we are; to see in that the expression of diversity of the many individual focusing creator beings, therein lies the purity of joy.